When the Software industry was hurting for business, the three giants Sun, IBM/Novell(Linux) and MS started producing condoms and named them Java-condo, CondomiX , and MS-Condome respectively.
A customer using Java-condo complained to Sun that the condom doesn't fit correctly. Sun replied: "Wait till we get the ISO standard". They boasted that it will fit to any size irrespective of underlying structure.
Well, the customer switched to CondomiX(Linux) and found that by the time he finshes reading the instructions, given along with CondomiX, his wife was sleeping and he himself forgetting why he is using CondomiX.
Finally he swiched to MS-Condome. To his surprise it was so good...and comfortable!. He used it happily. Six months later he found that his wife was pregnant. He got angry and complained to Micrsoft. He got his reply from MS:
Anyone want to guess?
Come on! No one?
A PATCH is coming soon
That's the good one ...
That made me chuckle. karma++
A man is sitting at an upscale bar and notices a very beautiful woman at another table. He pulls one of the waiters over and has him send her a bottle of thier most expensive wine. The woman is surprised, but she accepts the gift and then sends the man a note. The note says" For me to accept this, you must have a bmw, a million dollars in the bank, and 7 inches in your pants." The man reads this all stoically and then sends her a note in reply. His note read" I have a bmw, a porsche, and a lexus in my garage at home. I have 5 million dollars in the bank. But not even for a beautiful woman such as yourself, would I cut off 3 inches. SEND THE WINE BACK!!"