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Thread: Dear Tech Support

  1. #1

    Dear Tech Support

    Last year I upgraded from Girlfriend version 7.0 to Wife version 1.0. I soon noticed that the new program began unexpected child processing that took up a lot of space and valuable resources.
    In addition, Wife 1.0 installed itself into all other programs and now monitors all other system activity. Applications such as Poker Night 10.3, Football 5.0 , Hunting and Fishing 7.5, and Racing 3.6

    I can't seem to keep Wife 1.0 in the background while attempting to run my favorite applications. I'm thinking about going back to Girlfriend 7.0 , but the uninstall doesn't work on Wife 1.0.
    Please help!

    Thanks,

    A Troubled User.


    REPLY:
    Dear Troubled User:

    This is a very common problem that men complain about.

    Many people upgrade from Girlfriend 7.0 to Wife 1.0, thinking that it is just a Utilities and Entertainment program. Wife 1.0 is an OPERATING SYSTEM..

    You cannot go back to Girlfriend 7.0 because Wife 1.0 is designed to not allow this. Look in your Wife 1.0 manual under Warnings-Alimony-Child Support. I recommend that you keep
    Wife1.0 and work on improving the situation. I suggest installing the background application "Yes Dear" to alleviate software augmentation.

    The best course of action is to enter the command C:\APOLOGIZE because ultimately you will have to give the APOLOGIZE command before the system will return to normal anyway.

    Wife 1.0 is a great program, but it tends to be very high maintenance. Wife 1.0 comes with several support programs, such as Clean and Sweep 3.0 , Cook It 1.5 and Do Bills 4.2.

    However, be very careful how you use these programs . Improper use will cause the system to launch the program Nag Nag 9.5 .. Once this happens, the only way to improve the performance of Wife 1.0 is to purchase additional software. I recommend Flowers 2.1 and Diamonds 5.0 !

    WARNING!!! DO NOT , under any circumstances, install Secretary With Short Skirt 3.3. This application is not supported by Wife 1.0 and will cause irreversible damage to the operating system.

    Best of luck,
    Tech Support

  2. #2
    Advisor Outlaw's Avatar
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    Re:Dear Tech Support


  3. #3
    Member AljoshaNL's Avatar
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    Re:Dear Tech Support

    [quote author=Saptech link=board=17;threadid=10837;start=0#msg97130 date=1134654990]
    C:\APOLOGIZE
    [/quote]

    Is there a WIFE 1.0 build for linux? If not: does it run under WINE? :P

  4. #4

    Re:Dear Tech Support

    [quote author=AljoshaNL link=board=17;threadid=10837;start=0#msg97132 date=1134658941]
    [quote author=Saptech link=board=17;threadid=10837;start=0#msg97130 date=1134654990]
    C:\APOLOGIZE
    [/quote]

    Is there a WIFE 1.0 build for linux? If not: does it run under WINE? :P
    [/quote]
    Don't you mean WHINE?

  5. #5
    Advisor Lovechild's Avatar
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    Re:Dear Tech Support

    I was talking to my ex yesterday about this.. she firmly claimed that boyfriend 2.0 could also be upgraded to wife 1.0 - since I would be doing the cooking, cleaning and pay the bills..

    I'm not sure if I should laugh or cry here.. real men cook... don't they?... please say they do.

  6. #6

    Re:Dear Tech Support

    [quote author=Lovechild link=board=17;threadid=10837;start=0#msg97140 date=1134716898]
    I was talking to my ex yesterday about this.. she firmly claimed that boyfriend 2.0 could also be upgraded to wife 1.0 - since I would be doing the cooking, cleaning and pay the bills..

    I'm not sure if I should laugh or cry here.. real men cook... don't they?... please say they do.
    [/quote]
    My dad is a better cook than his wife. I like to cook, and my gf can barely cook.

  7. #7
    Mentor cga's Avatar
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    Re:Dear Tech Support

    I'm a big fan of Food Network and like to cook myself. Look at at the great cheifs out there who are men.

  8. #8
    Moderator
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    stryder144's Avatar
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    Re:Dear Tech Support

    Boyfriend 2.0 can be upgraded to Husband 1.0 with few initial problems. For added functionality, especially if the intended use of the Husband 1.0 OS is domestic in nature, you will need to upgrade certain aspects of the OS. May we suggest downloading and installing DomesticMan 1.3 and BoysNightOut 7.6. You might find the upgrade path a lot smoother if Wife 1.0 is also updated with the following add-ons: FrenchMaid Theme 4.3, CatWoman Theme 2.2 and Dominatrix Theme 1.1.

    Cheers

  9. #9
    Advisor Outlaw's Avatar
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    Re:Dear Tech Support

    I cook also. Although I'm a beginner in skill.

  10. #10
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    Schotty's Avatar
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    Re:Dear Tech Support

    I can cook:

    Hot water
    Ramen Noodles
    Microwaveable TV Dinners
    Jello (Gelatin and pudding)
    Eggs.

    Thats about it. Pretty comprehensive list, I know. But someone had to learn it.

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